by David Brenneman
"In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren; and these whom He predestined, He also called; and these whom He called, He also justified; and these whom He justified, He also glorified." Romans 8:26-30.
There's been many a time when indeed I have been without words yet know that I needed to pray.
There's been many times when my grief is so overwhelming that the words cannot begin to flow.
There's freedom in the truth that the Spirit of God within does understand our hearts and minds.
When my thoughts assail me and I have nothing but chaos...I know that somehow the Spirit finds His way through it all.
We cannot see the beginning from the end most of the time. We often delude ourselves by thinking that this or that is over.
We are not God with respect to that kind of knowledge.
Life's been chaotic more in the last few months than has been for a while now. This happens, that happened. This broke and needs fixing, that too a week later. This event is somehow in the middle of fixing things. Then at work I get dropped in the middle of learning something that is beyond intense to me. Here comes the optical migraines.
Yet none of these things will ever stop God from causing all things to work together for good for me because He loves me.
The shock of losing a very close coworker yesterday has yet to sink in. While I know he's with Jesus I fight a form of jealousy at where he is. I know not how or what the future is going to look like at work now. People are soon going to learn just how much he was really doing, beyond what he was responsible for doing, while at work.
I normally do not get optical migraines yet in the last week I have had several. Waiting them out as I make myself calm down is the only thing I can do.
I have no words at times like these.
Yet, in Christ, I am not without words. Even if I cannot articulate my emotions or feelings, the Spirit of God within understands.
I was lead to find that passage yesterday where it says that we who are in Christ do not grieve like those who have no hope. My friend Steve, exactly like what a very popular evangelist once said, "One day you will read in the papers that I have died. I want you to know that you shouldn't believe a word of it. For I will be more alive than I ever have been. All I have done is changed my address!".
While I struggle with what's going on in my head and heart Jesus knows and understands. The Bible says that He was a man of sorrows, well acquainted with grief. Furthermore it says that we do not have a Savior who is distant or doesn’t understand.
Jesus knows me.
Jesus knows you.
We can hide behind words and say we're alright even when we aren't.
We cannot do that with Jesus.
Life will not be the same, but it will be different. Jesus is the one who prunes His branches. To obtain the growth necessary sometimes it's required to remove branches.
We simply must rest in the arms of Jesus until we are able to stand.
We must cling to His promises and His purpose for us while we yet have the breath of life still in our lungs.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6.
And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7.
I don't need to understand everything. Everything doesn't need to make sense to me.
Everything always makes sense to my Savior and Lord Jesus Christ.
It's on me to rest in Him until He says it's time to move on.
These moments of uncertainty will always be a part of life.
The certain thing is that those in Christ are not alone in it.
All NASB 1995 and NASB Scripture Excerpts used by permission. (C) Lockman Foundation.
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